Last night, I finally made the pilgrimage that millions of women have made since Friday - I went to see the Sex and the City movie. Overall, it was exactly what I expected. Okay, I read a ton of spoilers. So whatever. It's well-documented that I have zero willpower. Anyway, it was okay. It kept my attention. It was nowhere near as entertaining as the show. Where the show was funny and quirky and sometimes even real-ish emotion-wise, the movie is straight-up cheesy. Like, for serious intensely cheesy. Here are a few of things I take issue with (ps: this list maybe a bit spoiler-y):
1. The whole finding love/Cinderella motif. When Carrie asks Louise why she came to NYC and she replies "I came here to fall in love." ?! Who would ever...ever...EVER do that or at the very least, who would ADMIT to that? ON A JOB INTERVIEW? And the Love keychain. And Big's final proposal, not slipping a ring on Carrie, but a fucking Manolo in the huge closet of Carrie's dreams? Holy shiiiit. Super cringe-worthy.
2. Samantha gets "fat" because she's trying not to jump her neighbor's bones and replacing her sexual urges with cake. Okay, when she showed up in NYC and revealed her tummy "fat" and everyone drew in their breath...I honestly didn't get it. Until they spelled it out to me blatantly, commenting to Sam how much weight she had gained. Dude...she was no one near fat or chubby or plump or anything. She looked the same. PS: Awesome message for your impressionable teen fans, SATC. I blame you for the next generation's eating disorders.
3. Stanford Blatch and Anthony Marentino?! NO NO NO. No fuckin' way. These two hated each for the entire run of the series and all of sudden they're BFF and making out on New Year's Eve? Does...not...compute. Such a cop-out to put these two together just because they're gay. Also, not nearly enough Stanford in the movie. He got like two lines, tops. Argh!
4. The Fergie theme song. This need not be explained. Vomitous!
5. Carrie Bradshaw. She always borderline annoyed me, but Carrie on the big screen makes me wanna throw knives. BAHH!
Not to be an entry of complete negativity, I'll tell you a few things I liked: Miranda as always and the whole Steve/Miranda storyline, Charlotte as comic relief, and Samantha had her moments too. Okay, I liked everyone except Carrie. Wah wah.
PS: And yes, there were groups of girls there in their designer knock-off dresses and stilettos. HEY, DO YOU THINK THEY WENT OUT FOR COSMOS AFTER?
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